Restricted!!!!

Feel so proud of myself for once!

Finally managed to restrict a bit! Resisted my nightly cup of granola..

Anyways...

My teachers, especially the math and chem teachers, are putting in a HELL lot of effort, i'm so touched.. i agree with the principal, that Bitch for once, that our school has the best group of teachers in Singapore.. i mean seriously, the teachers in the other schools don't care so much.

Can you imagine if i got a DAMN GOOD o level score??!!! It would be the best present i've given to myself so far, plus i would be really skinny by the time i get it so it would definitely be one of the best days of my miserable existence.

I'M SO GONNA DO THIS FOR ME.

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

Definitely one of the best quotes i have EVER come across.

edit: looking at S's photos, the first severe anorexic of my school... she is REALLY cured now. Don't know why i'm crying though. Must be a mix of extreme happiness for her and also great disappointment

FORMULA ONE!!!

AWESOME!! i love love love the F1 Singapore night race. watching it on tv's like watching an xbox game, only it's really happening, and the skyline's freaking awesome too:) Love my country:)

Gonna study like one chapter of bio, one chapter of social studies, two chem papers and if possible, some math tonight. I know it sounds kinda daunting but i'm so used to it it's like whatever.. same ol' same ol'...

I hate it when people refer to my cutting myself

in such a casual manner.

Like it's nothing.

Those unfeeling, nonchalant remarks,

"The knife's so sharp, doesn't it hurt?"

Can't they tell what hurts are those remarks?

That's the real knife,

makes me cry every fuckin time they do that,

and i don't even know why,

can't help it either.

Shut up if you don't understand!

I hate it when people tell me not to starve myself,

as if i have a damn choice.

The way they tell me i'm already beautiful, no need for this.

That they love me the way i am,

that i'm skinny already

not at all fat.

Telling me these things as if i'll EVER believe them

as if they expect me to love myself,

to stop hating that freak in the mirror

like the way they don't.

Why can't they just understand?

Or shut up if they don't?

Thinking skinny.

My sis keeps scolding me for thinking skinny, critisising fatsos, thinking that being fat is wrong etc. Well fuck her, i'm not gonna follow her fat ass mindset.

Have you seen the latest deathly hallows trailer? I cried the first time, and so many subsequent times i watched it:D

SELF PROCLAIMED MANIAC HARRY POTTER FAN!!!:D

Kinda slowed down studies a bit, trying to force myself to speed up a bit more..

TORTURE ENDS NOVEMBER 15

THIN AGAIN ON NOVEMBER 15

Please come quick!!

LATEST HP TRAILER HERE

SUCCESS PLEASE?

Oh My goodness. Dying.

But i am going to make it.

I miss my life so much.

Especially the feeling of thin and football.

I just pray for success and for God to reward me. I don't care about survival.

I just want this so bad.