The story of my life. Now, in college, I neither have a clique nor a bestie, so basically i'm a floater. Which suits me perfectly. But it tends to get terribly lonely, and if i'm hanging out with a clique i'm not part of them so it's perfectly fine to let me be left out. I feel terribly lonely in college, yet I am so scared to get too near to anyone. I'm so lonely, so lonely.
I'm doing a college survey now, about our wellbeing and the questions go like " I cry ofetn/ have difficulty sleeping" and strongly disagree, disagree, agree, strongly agree. There are questions like if you cut yourself, if you wanna hurt yourself , if you need help and wanna talk to someone. I want to click strongly agree for I wanna talk to someone. ( I need help and I want to speak to someone) I wanna talk to someone, damn it. I'm a freaking tornado inside and i'm losing it. But, to talk to humans, they leave, you see. They always do.
This is one of those times when those fogs of great melancholy sets upon me. And it's not lifting.
(I've decided to paint a false picture of happiness in the survey, i'm only gonna be in college for 2 years, this being my last, no point building deep roots anywhere)
Gonna exercise as much as I can now!!
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