I'm so fucking miserable. I think I have BDD, a really bad case, and it's driving me nuts, I can't even go into the bathroom and hence bathe etc when it strikes. I weigh 102.3lbs currently but when it's bad I look into the mirror and LITERALLY HONEST TO GOD see a 140lb individual I don't know what to do.
I have ordered Wasted and it's at the bookstore waiting for me. Goodness, my precious baby book's gonna be FINALLY mine.
Since the start of May till now i've lost 7.7lbs. Could be more, but for some reason something's stopping me from being so mean to myself this time. Maybe I just like myself just a little bit better.
I'm so fat. My STGW currently is 94lbs. I wanna make it down to 88 and see where I go from there. My lowest is 85.5. Compared to that i'm a whale.
I survived my exams week and i'm kinda confident for all the results except for chemistry. Chem was barbaric. Surprisingly, and for the very first time in college, I am pretty confident for math.
Everyone's like time to relax etc, i'm like no, it's after THIS particular exam, but before the A levels. Maybe it's just me, I feel kinda useless if I relax too much, I always feel like I must be doing something.
I just wish I were just a little saner.
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