I hate this

I hate eating normally. EVERYSINGLETIME i'm eating something, I have no idea if it's because I want to, feel like it, should, can, don't know if I should be but just doing so for the sake of it, or because i'm just bingeing. It's scary as hell and making me so fat. My dear friend told me "omg you became chubbier! So cute" I want to just fucking die already. I feel like not eating a single calorie for at least 2 days the moment my exams end. I hate being fat, I hate people fucking pointing it out, I hate eating, I hate calories, freak.....I don't know what to say. And best of all I ain't even putting this to good use, i've screwed up nearly every single paper so far. I HATE THIS.

Out of plain curiosity, I calculated my dad's calorie intake for today (as much as I remember him eating) =4015. hahaha. wtheck.

I just want to be fucking skinny again.